Musings

June 4, 2016

I am a girl who likes a pink drink!  I know, I know - you’re thinking: cranberry martini, glass of Rose wine, or a raspberry-infused mojito.  Nope!  While I won’t turn those down, what I’m really talking about is a Shirley Temple!  So, when I walked into Claudine’s and saw that their Soda Fountain was comprised of craft sodas, with a Shirley Temple option, my heart was sold.  But that was just the beginning.

 

The two co-owners, Lea and Anthony, couldn’t be more inviting and excited about their new venture.  They are making a superbly concerted effort to talk to and get to know the customers that walk through their doors, every day, making this new Café feel like a true neighborhood haunt.  The fact that the food is Organic, Locally sourced and delicious…is an all-time added bonus.

 

Lea is a pastry chef and arrives around 3AM every morning to bake ALL of their sweets, fresh, daily.  Anthony heads up the savories with a Classical and Fine Dining Training.  The two...

As I write this, I have a pit in my stomach and tears streaming down my face.  I share this vulnerability with you because all too often, we do not.  All too often, we remain withdrawn, closed off and emotionally unavailable.   All too often, we do not represent ourselves truly, honestly, authentically – especially when we’re grieving. 

 

Someone says, “How are you doing?” and I say, “I’m okay.  It’s a hard day but I’m fine”.  Do you know how I really feel and what I really want to say?  What I really want to do is yell, “I’m not fine, I miss my dad and I’m pretty fucking pissed off that he’s not here.”  How would you deal with that kind of response? 

 

As a society and especially as moms, we are quick to showcase anything and everything that is going “well”.  Achievements (big and small), smiling families, parties, announcements, awards…these postings highlight the virtual walls of Facebook, Snapchat, Instagram, Pinterest or Twitter.  These images a...

 

Drugs.  For most parents, this word and the idea of what it represents, evokes fear, anxiety and the unknown.  If you have a child between the ages of 8 and 13, you may even feel that you’re staring down the tracks of a freight train plowing, headlights first, into you.  Maybe you don’t know what to expect, how to start the conversation with your child, or you simply don’t want to have the conversation at all.  If you’re like many, you may even be thinking, “Not me.  I’m a good, involved mom  (or dad).  That won’t happen to me. “  Denial.

 

Tonight, thanks to Jen Levinson's hard work, I attended Down and Dirty’s first community-wide sponsored event.  Generously hosted by the Canyon Club, Down and Dirty aimed to educate the attendees on this growing epidemic.  Drugs are sweeping through our homes, schools, clubs, religious affiliations and the social events that we send our children to, thinking they’re safe.  This affects us all.  We cannot ignore this...

April 27, 2016

You can feel it in the air.  Summertime – in all of its glory – is upon us.  Walking through the school courtyard or your nearest outdoor mall, music is blaring, bubbles are blowing and children are screaming and playing outdoor-in shorts and short-sleeved-ts, no less.  While our weather may not have fully figured it out yet, Summer is definitely around the corner.  That can only mean one thing: complete and utter routine upheaval!!

 

Later bedtimes,  more sugar-y foods, beach days, out-of-the-norm meals, camp schedules,  and fun.  What else accompanies all of this?  Tantrums!  Changes in behaviors and the need for discipline when you just want to take it easy and relax.

 

While you, the parent, don’t have to wake early to pack lunches or stay up or put out tomorrow's school clothes, this change in the daily routine often illicits less than pleasurable behaviors from the little ones.  Why is this?  Summer time should mean “relaxation staycation”.  Unfortu...

April 21, 2016

My children are on Spring Break.  If I'm being completely honest, they're driving me bat-shit crazy...some of the time.  Please don't misunderstand.  I've loved our "time off" together - not packing lunches, being able to sleep in or even spend the entire day in our jammies.  All good things.  But every so often, I hear 3 little words and I seriously want to poke my eyes out.

 

“Mommy, I’m bored”.  There are, of course, other options, like: “Mom, I don’t know what to do”, or “Mommy, I have nothing to play with”, but in my house, I most often hear, "Mommy, I'm bored."  Seriously!

 

How hard is it to not scream back because your child is literally sitting amongst new books, 3 recently purchased new toys, actually has a friend over, or just completed an activity and isn’t used to any “down time”? 

 

There are actually two things happening here.  First, it is a necessity to teach our children it’s okay to slow down and be still..even, dare I say it, be bor...

September 30, 2015

When I sent the first emails out to friends and family, announcing my new venture, Crimson Club, I knew that I’d receive mixed reviews.  After all, any time something new launches you will get a plethora of responses – some extolling the virtues and others, second-guessing. 

 

Some parents signed their daughters up immediately, thanking me, for starting something like this.  “This is so needed”, they commented.  And I would smile in agreement and thank them for their support and belief in me.  But others had to have 3-5 phone conversations (with me) just to discuss their concerns about having their daughters join the group. 

 

I wanted to say to these parents, “If you’re really not sure, don’t do it.  Just wait.”  But as with any new venture, when you’re trying to establish the efficacy of it, you have to play the role of cajoler, controller, friend, listener, advice-giver and anything else that one would need to make up their mind.  Then there was a third subset of par...

August 28, 2015

Newborns. They are breed all their own.  Yes, you can read books, watch a video blog, talk to friends and ask questions of your pediatrician.  Until you have your own newborn in your arms, in your home, you won’t know what it’s truly like and how it changes you instantly.   When you finally become someone's mommy, you will finally know what a blessing it is and what it feels like to have someone to love so completely.

 

Having a newborn, in my opinion, shows you the true meaning of both unconditional love and complete dependence. Newborn babies require and unknowingly demand your constant time, attention and love.  It’s not difficult to give them this but it can still be physically exhausting, emotionally draining, and constant.  In return, your newborn has made you a parent.  They ultimately become your greatest teacher. Here’s why I’m talking to you about newborns today.

 

In your earliest moments with your new child, you may feel overwhelmed and blissed-out...

August 18, 2015

When Big was just a few months old and I was still voraciously collecting parenting magazines, articles, books and actually scrutinizing them for relevant information, I came across an article that really stuck out.  It resonated with me so much, in fact, that it has guided a recent career change.

 

A mother of two girls wrote the article.  She talked about the importance of staying close with her daughters and ways that she had found to do this.  In particular she had created a unique support group for her daughters and their friends, with the sole purpose of discussing issues and concerns around Sex Ed, body changes (puberty), parents, school, boys, friends, and all things Tween- and Teen-related. They met, in her home, bi-monthly, where they found a common space to literally and figuratively “be there” for each other and honor themselves, as they became young women.

 

To me, this seemed profound and I knew then, when Big was only a few months old, that one day, I’d do the...

August 15, 2015

Aah, Back To School…the time when moms and dads rejoice, and well, our children…it depends.  That is, it depends on how we (the parents) treat this time of year.  Most young children take their emotional cues from those they love and trust, their parents.  I know you’re well aware of the term, “modeling” but it goes without saying that your children are really looking to you (at all times) when trying to figure out how to feel about different situations and how to act in a multitude of scenarios - this time of year and always.  As you talk to your children about heading back into the classroom and onto the school yeard, there are a few key things to keep in mind for a smooth transition back to school.

 

For starters, summer time is all about flexibility and spontenaeity.  While that is fun and typically works – longer days, less responsibility to scheduiling conflicts, etc.,- all of a sudden, there are play dates, longer school days, after school activities and r...

April 27, 2015

Trying to figure out if your child is ready to potty-train can be as simple as watching him try it on his own or as difficult as learning a new language.  While he may show signs that he knows and understands “the feeling to go” he may not want to stop playing or may even do the potty dance and then pee in his pants.  Should you force the issue and put him in underpants or wait?  What is the best way to potty train?

 

Here's the tough part about potty training:  you can't ever force a child “to go” if they're not physically or emotionally ready.  Yes, there are tricks and suggestions I can give you but if your child really isn't "wanting" to do the “pee or poo in the potty", it's hard to force the issue.  Smart children know that they can control this and they use it to their advantage.  As a side note, It’s VERY common with children when there has been a recent addition to the family or another big “life change”, for potty issues to become more difficu...

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